foxnewsofficial:

hey could you hold this for me *gives you my hand*

(Source: strongbowdarkfruit, via itquiet)

mjalti:

enjoy the short term!!! sometimes ur not gonna be friends for 46 years and that’s ok, just enjoy the drive!!! some people aren’t gonna have a significant impact in ur life but not every show is a TedTalk, sometimes u needs some Real Housewives!!’ loosen up, the universe is rearing to explode and if that bix isn’t permanent herself, you’ve got nothing to lose! forever is an illusion

platypusplayhere:

when in doubt slap His ass

(via danger)

lifeismufkinweird:

Get your life together on the low. No one has to know what you’re doing and how.

(via divided-emotions)

peenslayer:

drunk me is the me i really want to be. confident, hilarious and, most importantly, drunk. 

(Source: peenslaya, via divided-emotions)